A few years ago, getting dressed wasn't something I thought too much about.
I'd walk into a store, pick up an XS, maybe a Small if I wanted something oversized, and head straight to the billing counter. Shopping felt easy. Fashion felt fun. Clothes were something I enjoyed experimenting with, not something I had to think twice about.
Then life happened.
Work happened. Stress happened. Long hours happened. Somewhere along the way, my body changed.
What started as a few extra kilos eventually became a completely different version of myself staring back at me in the mirror.
The funny thing is, the weight gain wasn't even the hardest part.
The hardest part was realizing how much of my relationship with fashion had been built around the assumption that clothes would always fit me.
Looking back now, I think that was the beginning of my real personal style journey.
Not when I bought my first trendy outfit. Not when I created Pinterest boards. Not when I started following fashion creators.
But when my body changed and I was forced to rethink everything I believed about fashion.
When Clothes Stop Fitting, Fashion Stops Feeling Fun
Nobody really talks about this.
People talk about body positivity. People talk about weight loss. People talk about confidence.
But very few people talk about what happens when your wardrobe suddenly stops working for you.
I remember opening my wardrobe one morning and realizing that most of my favourite clothes no longer fit the way they used to.
- Some were too tight.
- Some looked different.
- Some technically fit but didn't make me feel good anymore.
For the first time, getting dressed felt frustrating.
I wasn't struggling because I didn't have clothes. I was struggling because I didn't know how to dress this version of myself.
That's a very different problem.
For years, I thought personal style was about finding clothes.
Now I was learning that personal style is really about finding yourself through changing seasons of life.
The Fashion Industry Loves Bodies — Just Certain Ones
One thing my experience taught me is how limited fashion can feel once you move outside a certain size range.
The moment you stop fitting into the "standard" sizes many brands design for, shopping becomes a completely different experience.
Suddenly:
- The fit isn't right.
- The proportions feel off.
- The styles available become limited.
- The confidence you once had starts disappearing inside fitting rooms.
And that's frustrating because real women don't stay the same size forever.
Bodies change. Hormones change. Lifestyle changes. Age changes. Health changes. Life changes.
Yet so much of fashion still feels designed around the idea that women should remain the same size forever.
My relationship with fashion changed because my body changed.
But the more conversations I had with other women, the more I realized this wasn't just my story.
It was theirs too.
Weight Gain Changed The Way I Look At Fashion
Before gaining weight, I used to admire clothes.
Now I pay attention to fit.
Before gaining weight, I followed trends.
Now I think about comfort.
Before gaining weight, I focused on what looked good.
Now I focus on what feels good.
And honestly, I think that's made my relationship with fashion healthier.
Because fashion stopped being about hiding flaws and started becoming about supporting the person wearing the clothes.
I no longer want clothes that punish me for existing.
I want clothes that move with me, fit me, and allow me to feel comfortable in my own skin.
That shift alone changed everything.
Confidence And Clothing Have A Complicated Relationship
For a long time, I thought confidence came from looking a certain way.
I thought confidence would magically appear once I lost weight, fit into smaller clothes, or looked more like the version of myself I had in my head.
But confidence doesn't work like that.
I've met women in every size category who are incredibly stylish.
I've met women who own amazing wardrobes yet still feel uncomfortable in their bodies.
Fashion confidence isn't about your size.
It's about your relationship with yourself.
While clothes can absolutely help you feel better, they cannot do all the work.
At some point, confidence has to come from accepting where you are today rather than waiting for a future version of yourself to arrive.
That was a difficult lesson for me.
But it was also one of the most important ones.
My Personal Style Journey Started When I Stopped Dressing For The Old Me
This was probably the biggest turning point.
For months, I kept buying clothes for the version of myself I wanted to become, not the version of myself I was.
Every purchase came with conditions:
"I'll wear this once I lose weight."
"This will look better later."
"I'll save this for when I get back to my old size."
Eventually, I realized something.
I deserved clothes that fit me now.
Not six months later.
Not ten kilos later.
Now.
The moment I started shopping for my current body instead of my future body, everything changed.
- Getting dressed became easier.
- Shopping became less emotional.
- Fashion became enjoyable again.
What Fashion Means To Me Today
Today, I see fashion very differently.
I don't think fashion is about trends.
I don't think fashion is about looking perfect.
And I definitely don't think fashion is about fitting into a specific size.
Fashion, at its best, is a tool.
It's a way of expressing who you are.
A way of showing up in the world.
A way of feeling like yourself.
Some days that might mean a perfectly styled outfit.
Other days it might mean oversized clothes, comfortable shoes, and a messy bun.
Both are valid.
Both are fashion.
Both are style.
What matters is how you feel wearing them.
The Real Lesson
If there's one thing my body changes and fashion experience taught me, it's this:
Your style should evolve as your life evolves.
We often talk about personal style as if it's something we're supposed to figure out once and keep forever.
But that's not how real life works.
The person I was at 20 is different from the person I am at 26.
My body is different.
My priorities are different.
My confidence is different.
So of course my style is different too.
And that's okay.
Maybe even necessary.
Because a personal style journey isn't about finding one perfect version of yourself.
It's about learning how to dress every version of yourself with the same kindness, confidence, and respect.
And honestly?
That's a much more interesting relationship with fashion than fitting into an XS ever was.